Hooray! Trump Wiped the Floor with Debate Opponent Chris Wallace

Via Politically Correct Humor

Oh, how I wish the first presidential debate had happened earlier in the year. Why? Because it has caused liberals to resurrect my absolute favorite fake complaint about Donald Trump, the “My child asked me” gripe from Twitter. I’ll get to that later. But first – I don’t care what anybody says. I think Donald Trump completely and totally wiped the floor with his debate opponent, moderator Chris Wallace. And what was with that creepy, robotic, talking Halloween-decoration skeleton that was on-stage assisting Wallace? Couldn’t Wallace have just debated Trump on his own without props or gimmicks?

As you’ve probably figured out already, this isn’t going to be a highly sophisticated analysis of the first debate. You watched it. I already know you watched it and formed your own opinion on it. Instead, I’m just going to make fun of the libs for a minute and hope that you’ll laugh along with me.

There were only two types of people in America on the night of September 29, 2020:

People who watched the first presidential debate because they fully expected Joe Biden to soil himself on stage, and people who couldn’t bear to watch the debate because they fully expected Joe Biden to soil himself on stage.

We also know that as long as Joe Biden managed to go 90 minutes without soiling himself on stage, the liberal media would declare Joe Biden the undisputed debate winner and try to call the rest of the debates off.

And as you know, Joe Biden managed to not poop his pants for 90 minutes.

Um… Yay?

Therefore, Joe Biden won the first debate and now it’s time to call the next two debates off, according to our garbage media. Why should we try to follow up on such perfection?!

What was with Chris Wallace’s pathetic performance, anyway? Even his Fox News colleagues are ripping on him for that pathetic show of partisan protectionism. When Wallace began laughing at President Trump after Joe Biden managed to mouth some memorized quip at him, Fox News host Greg Gutfeld tweeted, “That’s not a good look.”

No. No, it’s not. Usually a “debate moderator” is able to contain themselves from not laughing at the lame jokes of one candidate at the expense of the other. But not the totally neutral, tough-but-fair Chris Wallace! He couldn’t help but laugh at the talking skeleton’s oh-so-funny joke that the rest of us immediately forgot.

Back in Somalia in 1994, during the so-called “Black Hawk Down” incident that I know way too much about, the soldiers on the ground had to deal with a very curious Somali cultural issue. Somali fighters in Mogadishu would run out into the street and take pot-shots at the Rangers, Deltas and SEALs. Then, when the US fighters would turn around to return fire, the Somali shooter would jump behind his unarmed wife and use her as a human shield.

Chris Wallace was Joe Biden’s Somali wife during the first presidential debate.

Every single time that Trump started to draw blood during the debate, Chris Wallace jumped in and used himself as a human shield to protect Joe Biden. It started to get weird toward the end, when Wallace shouted, “Stop picking on my husband! We are NOT talking about the $3.5 million that some Russian mayor’s wife sent to Hunter Biden while my husband Joe was on a trip to Ukraine!!!”

What a train wreck. It was pathetic.

Fortunately, after the debate was over, CNN “news” anchor Jake Tapper resurrected my absolute, tippy-top favorite fake liberal complaint about Donald Trump – the fake “my child said” complaint. Those are so hilarious! I’ve been missing them the past few months, because so many journalists stopped using those complaints due to public mockery. If you’ve never seen one of those, they go something like this.

Some liberal media figure on Twitter declares that Donald Trump is the worst ever, because their small child asked them a sophisticated foreign or domestic policy question that they had no answer for. For example:

“My four-year-old daughter asked me before her bedtime last night why Trump is so aggressively moving naval battle carrier groups around in the Indian Ocean to counter China’s territorial ambitions in the South China Sea. I didn’t know what to say. I AM LITERALLY SHAKING!!!!”

I love those!

Well, after the debate, Jake Tapper delivered one of those live on air. It was awesome. His “friend in Kansas” had texted him about their “sixth-grade daughter” who had started to watch the debate. But then, the child had to run from the room crying because Trump is literally Hitler and just so awful and mean that his very existence and meanness and Hitler-ness makes little kids cry.


Thank you, Jake! Have these people ever even met a child in their lifetime, aside from the ones that Jeffrey Epstein once introduced them to?

Meanwhile, that debate was pretty awful. I don’t have high expectations if any of the remaining debates take place later (assuming that Joe Biden’s handlers won’t agree to the proposed Joe Rogan-moderated debate). Chris Wallace of Fox News was the friendliest debate moderator that Trump will see this year, so we can already picture how the rest of them will go. And I don’t care what anyone else says: Trump totally kicked his opponent Chris Wallace’s rear-end in that first debate.

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11 Responses


  2. It was a rather comical debate. Anyone who could not see that Chris Wallace was protecting Biden and not being too tough with Biden’s questions must definitely be in denial. I only watched to see if Biden would crack and I heard that he would probably be drugged to boost his resistance and also wired so his handlers could talk to him. Well, it appears he was drugged because he squinted throughout the debate which could be a sign that he was drugged. I also saw a picture of the wire under his jacket that he tried to push back in. I know there were reports that the wire was actually a crease in his clothing but it definitely was a wire I saw in the pic. I was very happy to see President Trump spoke his mind even with Chris Wallace protesting every time the President tried to protect himself from the lies coming out of Biden’s wire. Kudos for President Trump. The President even mentioned Hunter and coup but not that he was asked about that. And funny, this morning he tested positive for the “virus”. Well, just at the right time, don’t you think? Biden’s handlers should be ashamed to do what they are doing to Biden. You can just look at his face and see he is demented. I have seen a few people with Alzheimer’s so I know about that.

  3. Joe Biden was already briefed in advance on questions he would be asked, and, why is it always a liberal for moderator and not a republican?

  4. He is a spoiled brat who got into the field with DADDY’s helping hand
    His silver spoon needs to be yanked out with his teeth
    And thrown down to the floor
    He just pushed himself onto the train tracks self tied
    He violate the conduct of the moderator ethics and codes
    He has no respect for nothing but his own ego not realizing that what he portrayed of himself made Biden bad and Trump stronger in the eyes of the Americans!!!!

  5. that fake posing as a journalist Chris the phony wallace had already snuck the questions over to hiden bidens team .what a joke wallace is. albeight a DANGEROUS one.

  6. Wallace is hitlers testicular cancer sweat!
    His hatred for America is nothing short of treason!
    A person with an audience must be held accountable for the narratives they promote!
    Indict find Wallace guilty of treason and election tampering as all media is guilty of seize their assets and close them down then hang them for their vial crimes upon America

  7. Did anyone see this morning where that little weasel puke, told Brian on Fox and Friends he had a snarky remark? Lmao! I soooo wish Brian could of put that little POS in its place. Keep it up Fox sticking up for the POS Dems, and you will be just another POS useless station like CNN, MSNBShi t… etc, etc.. I love Fox and Friends but, I would love that station MORE, if it was done for. The sooner the better!

  8. I like the story about the man using his wife as a shield after he takes a shot. What I saw was a playground fight with two boys, and then comes along Wallace who has his favorite and starts supplying the favorite with sticks and stone to hit the opponent with. I was so wishing that Wallace would have kept his mouth shut. If Wallace was a favorite, he is not now. Biden was not the Biden he was a week ago. I wonder if he was given a hormone shot or something to change his behavior as he sure seemed different then the befuddled man he was a week ago or even a month ago.

  9. I actually enjoyed the Debate, almost as much as I enjoyed the back peddling of the Biden campaign, consoling their supporters that Biden fully supported the DNC Platform despite his statements during the debate, and that Biden re-assured all of them that Biden was not the Democrat Party calling the shots. I laughed the day after the debate, as hard as I did the day of the debate.

  10. Once again, Humpty Dumpty Biden fell on his head and his little friend, Wallace attempted to save his little ass! Both pathetic liars and cheats! Humpty forgot what date, time and place he’s currently at! Democraps really pick The Wiiners! The Prez won!

  11. I could see there was a wire shaped on his right cheek going into His ear . Reminds me of the Movie “Head of State “ with Chris Rock (2003). He was a janitor and they made him run for President and told him what to say with a wirer in his ear . Pretty funny movie . Biden didn’t answer hardly any answers. Trump won this one . .

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